i suck at writing those year reflections

2008, it was great.
2009, it's gonna be damn fine.

this year had ups and downs, but let's just remember the ups, people!
maybe i'll write a reflection sometime next year.
... or not.

sometimes the vampire look isn't good for everyone

Cam Gigandet plays James (Edward Cullen's nemesis) in Twilight.
Let's look at what we have here:

Exhibit A

Cam Giganet as a Gap 2008 Winter Season model.
EXTREMELY HOT.

Exhibit B
Cam Giganet as James the vampire.
NOT SO HOT.

So in conclusion,
Robert Pattinson is hot as a human, but also hot as a vampire.

Have a good new years friends!

Campus
To dream that you are on a campus, indicates your need to expand your thinking/knowledge and challenge yourself mentally.

Picture
To see a picture in your dream, symbolizes a mental imprint that remains persistent in your mind. There may be permanence in your actions. Also consider the pun on "picture this" or "seeing the big picture" in a situation.

To dream that you are taking a picture, suggests that you need to get a good understanding and gain more information on some issue. You need to focus more attention to some situation or relationship. Perhaps you feel that you need to recapture some past moments in a relationship.

Crush

To dream that you have a crush on somebody, is a literal reflection of your attraction and fascination for that person. To see your crush in your dream, represents your current infatuation with him or her. If you find yourself thinking about him during the day, then it is understandable that his image will appear in your dream during the night. If you dream of your crush frequently, then your dream maybe be telling you that it is time to let this person know how you feel, especially if you are dreaming of him or her in a good way. Only good things can happen from you telling your crush. Even if he or she is not interested, at least you can move on and stop waiting time on him or her.

quite the dream i had last night. -___-

i woke up to my edward cullen poster. LAWL. it's hanging on the wall on the foot of my bed.

i got a tv for christmas! woot. i put together my tv stand yesterday (with my dad's help of course) and i have my tv set up. no cable yet tho. i'll post some pictures of my improved room.

christmas was goood. i hit up a total of 5 family parties in 2 days. and i ate at all of them -___-

i've been sick since christmas eve and i'm trying to get rid of it.

also, i've started taking voice lessons. i'm really excited about it. i know a lot of ppl don't get why i'm taking lessons. haha.

yeahhhh... that's all i've got for now.
i miss everyone on break.
actually, i miss a lot of people.

this one's for all ya'lls, my first attempt at guitar -_____-

have a good day, friends!

i wish you a...

happy birthday, Jesus!
i miss you guys & hope you're all have fun at home w/ your families!

i've dug myself into a hole

now i just have to get out.

::epic fail:: lawl.

i'm excited for things to come!
2009, everything's gonna be fine.

it's friday.

the days have been blending into one.
i wish i wasn't so freaking broke right now.
and i also with that i wasn't fail.
ahh, fail.

i'm disappointed in you.

although i'm not on break, because my whole life is a break right now, i'm glad that everyone else is on break so i have people to talk to. haha.

Singing
To sing in your dream, represents happiness, harmony and joy in some situation or relationship. You are uplifting others with your positive attitude and cheerful disposition. Singing is a way to celebrate, communicate and express your feelings.

To hear someone sing in your dream, signifies emotional and spiritual fulfillment. You are changing your mood and experiencing a more positive outlook in life.

i like this.

i've been writing a lot of facebook notes as of late. it's a result of my boredom in the wee hours of the morning.

btw, i need to stop digging myself in this hole. haha.

it's cold. and i love it.

peace friends.

wow, i can't wait for the movie season

next year is going to have some awesome movies:
Harry Potter & The Half Blood Prince (OMG i can't wait)
New Moon - The second twilight movie, i don't even know when that's out but you know i'm gonna be ON that.

and this movie - I Love You, Man looks like it's gonna be freaking hilarious. If you like Jason Segal, Adam Sandburg, or Paul Rudd than you'll like this:



HILAR.
2009, it's gonna be fine.

cooking fail.

this is why i love my cousin:

Krystle Tugadi: kirs...how do you cook spam
Krystle Tugadi: its one block?!??!
Kirsten Ascio: LOL
Kirsten Ascio: you cut it foo
Kirsten Ascio: cmon krystle
Krystle Tugadi: oh eww
Krystle Tugadi: it doesnt come pre cut?!
Kirsten Ascio: omg.

epic fail.

O.M.G.

please tell me you remember this song.

EPIC.
music was so much better back then. lawl.

here's some good ones:




i couldn't find the music video for this one:


in honor of my blog:






and finally:


lawl.
ohhh man.
so good.

you guys have any good ones

seriously.

your mood swings are giving me whiplash.

oh, how time flies...

it's been 8 years since i graduated from 8th grade.
4 years since high school.
catching up with old friends always makes me nostalgic.
it's crazy how it doesn't seem so long ago.

more on that later.

Rest in peace, Tita Nancy. Thank you for all you taught me.

and i am tellin' you

Basketball

To dream that you are playing basketball, indicates that you will need the cooperation and assistance of others in order to achieve your goals. Perhaps you are standing in the way of your own progress and need to ask for help.

Dress

To see or wear a dress in your dream, represents a feminine outlook or feminine perspective on a situation. You are freely expressing your femininity.

I don't really remember the dream besides those things.

Anyways. Another excellent weekend, another excellent Benefit Concert. Good job to all! It was really nice seeing everyone.

I really missed these guys:

The Class of '08 back together again.

Hopefully we'll all be together again soon.

In other news, I watched Twilight on Saturday. Now, that's what I call a piece of crap movie. The only thing that saved it for me, is how hot Robert Pattinson is. WOOOO. I mean, seriously. But yeah, the movie was crap. It didn't do justice to the book AND it was just bad in general. But hey, if anyone wants to watch it, I'm down to watch it again. Just to watch Edward Cullen for 2 hours is fine by me. LOL.

K, another week! I'll be on my way.

Peace.

something feels off

i really don't know what it is.
but something is definitely wrong.
it's unsettling.
i don't like this.

i am obsessed

with Edward Cullen.
aka Robert Pattinson.
aka Cedric Diggory.

zOMG. i can't wait til the movie comes out.
I'm going to start book 4 tonight. yes, i know. i read fast. and yeah, i'm not a loser. i'm just awesome.

reading all day

i spent the majority of my day reading. and it was quite enjoyable. no, i wasn't studying, obviously. what would i be studying for?

***sidebar story
i was at CSL on my laptop watching Angel (shut up.) and i see mark sescon walking in to CSL. he walks up to me and says "hey kirs, what's up? are you studying?" and i laugh and say, "what would i be studying for?"

"Life?"

***end story

ANYWAYS, i just finished reading Twilight a few hours ago, after starting it at 2pm. I'm taking a break from reading the 2nd book to rest my eyes a little. so i'm writing a blog? i don't know. the book is freaking awesome!!!!!1 anyone feel me on that?

the movie comes out next friday!
i'm either gonna watch the midnight showing if there is one, OR on saturday. I CAN'T WAIT.

k. i will resume reading soon.
goodnight! assuming i go to sleep at all.

first time in a long time

That an episode of Grey's made me tear up. Callie's breakdown was ::ok hand motion::
I hate that I blog about tv, but what else do I have really?

Anyways, there are a lot of things in my head right now. I mean, I'm no crazy, like Izzie Stevens, but there's so much goin' on up there. I have a lot of time to think, you know? No job, well, technically no job yet. So I have a lot of time to think.

Just because I'm not in school anymore, doesn't mean I still can't procrastinate. I'm procrastinating on life right now. And it's not because I'm lazy (well, it is a little bit), but it's because I'm scared. I'm really scared. I don't think I've told anyone that, well besides Him. But hell yeah, I'm scared. Call me a wussy if you want. I'm not saying I'm no good at anything, but what if what I'm good at, won't take me anywhere? I'm scared that I'm going to fail. I'm scared that everything I've learned these past few years, not just in school, but in my faith, the things I learned about who I am, are just going to fade away.

I usually don't like when there is such a negative blog post, then one ties it up with an encouraging outlook on life, but that's exactly what I'm going to do. I know I'm scared and that I might not be strong enough. But it's not MY strength that I need. It's His.

Anyways, enough about that. I teared up today during Grey's (what a sap) and I also shed a few during the meeting on Tuesday. It's been a while since I've cried during praise & worship, but I Adore always gets to me. This is the first time in a while where I didn't just cry because I was sad or stressed about something, but just to be in His presence. To feel His love over everything else. It was amazing.

If you didn't know, I'm Guiding Lights new music director. :D exciting! Although the duties are quite similar to what I did as music ministry head in Liwanag, it's challenging me in new ways. I love it. It's most definitely not going to be easy, but it's most def worth it. Pray for me & pray for us!

Also, my tita woke up from her coma, but she's just barely hanging on. She's moved out of the icu, but is now in hospice care at the nursing home. Please keep her and my family in your prayers.

While this is irrelevant to what I talked to in my post, everytime Meredith Grey starts her closing dialogue on the episode it gets to me:

The ties that bind us are sometimes impossible to explain; they connect us even after it seems like the ties should be broken. Some bonds defy distance and time and logic, because some ties are simply meant to be.

Amen to that, sister.
Goodnight!

Hairvolution: A Comprehensive Look at the Ridiculousness That Is My Hair

So, I've been feeling nostalgic as of late, looking at old pictures. And I've come to realize that I've had quite a ridiculous variation in hair colors and cuts. Nez gave me the idea of making a post dedicated to my different hairstyles, but I started from my freshman year to the beginning of my third year and it was already too much. That's where most of the action was anyway. I might as well dedicate some time to this post, considering i don't have anything better to do.

fall quarter alone I went through 4 hair colors.

my first night in the dorms with fading green hair.

few weeks later with purple/blue

not sure when this is, but it's pink

then by the end of fall, I was tired of dyeing my hair.
(Go St. Benedict Family :D)

during winter break, I decided I wanted to look like an anime character. So I chopped off my hair.

at guppy's

me with another color and my bro at my parents' 25th wedding anniversary

decided it wasn't short enough, so i cut off even more.

with the in crowd at interfaith.
(i wasn't the only one who went through style changes. check out brenton's shoes!)
btw, can i be skinny again? kthanks.

this hair style lasted through the summer
(picture from vegas!)

at the end of summer, i contemplated growing my hair out, but decided against it

so i thought THIS would be cool. seriously, what was i thinking?
picture from welcome week 2005.

sporting purple in the front & blonde in the back
at Puso Gala 2005.

hair getting longer, thumbs getting shorter.
(fridays for nimz's birthday)

since my hair was getting longer, ponytails were a must.
(vegas to ring in 2006)

spirit rally 2006.

i think Banquet 2006 was a turning point

i was sad about my short hair, and i wanted to grow it out.
(log installs 2006)

finally after growing my hair out for a whole year

Puso Gala 2006 it was somewhat long.

I'm lazy to do the rest. That's just 2004-2006.

Wow, how bored am I.

i'm supposed to be getting ready

but i had the urge to blog, and i didn't want to lose it because my blogging has been so-so lately.

last night we were talking about how i couldn't remember my dreams. i always want to blog about them because i always forget, but i've always wanted to analyze the shit i dream about. i read your guys' blogs, and i wanna analyze my shit if i'm dreaming about weddings or parking lots. so i remember my dream from last night, but i'm not really sure about the details, and i don't think there's one thing that i can pick out as an underlying message. maybe?

i had a dream that i was part of the cast of Angel (LAWL, i know. i HAVE been watching too much angel. sidebar: gerard was asking me last night if i've had any dreams about Angel, and i was like "no that would be stupid" but, lo and behold, i had a dream about Angel last night!) or rather, I was a part of Angel Investigations (from like the actual show). One of our peeps was trapped in a situation. But it was like The Grudge 3! THE MOVIE. Does that make sense? Like if they were to make a movie for the Grudge 3, it would crossover with Angel the TV show!

So like the premise for the movie was that the curse, or The Grudge, effects one person, who in turn effects another person. So all these people who have been affected by the curse live in a museum!

that's all i remember. so is this about movies? or museums? curses?

Museum

To see a museum in your dream, indicates that your non-traditional path to success will make you unique and stand out from the rest. Alternatively, the museum may represent a history of yourself and your past. There are many things you can learn from your past and your family's past. Consider what you have gained from these experiences and apply them to your current circumstances.

To dream that you are in a museum, gives you the opportunity for you to review and reflect on the things you value in life.

Movie

To dream that you are playing a role in the movie, foretells that something from your unconscious is about to emerge or be revealed. It may also represent memories of images or scenes from your past. Alternatively, the dream may be pointing you toward a new role that you might be undertaking. Your unconscious is psychologically preparing you for this new role.

Curse

To dream that you or someone is under a curse, suggests that you are getting caught up in your own guilt. You also need to proceed with caution in some situation or relationship.

well, great. i can see what my dreams did there.

since i blogged, i'm going to be late. apologies friends.

reading your blog this morning gave me inspiration to blog too. mine wasn't as long as yours tho (that's what.... never mind.)

my nails are bright red.

i wonder if i could turn back the clock three years, if i would make the same mistakes choices i made back then, knowing how everything would effect me today. i probably wouldn't.

ok, good day my friend.

i <333 val emmich

i'm not much of a two-post-in-a-day blogger, but i think that Val Emmich is the cutest boy ever. zOMG. i just watched ugly betty and he's been on 2 other episodes and wow, he's adorable. not only that, he's a musician!


drool.
he's such a cutie.

i don't know if he's gonna be on the show anymore. waahh.

btw, tv was excellent tonight.

that's all. goodnight!

and another one...

a new goal in life: to become a YTS (youtube star)

haha. half-joking, half-serious goal. i mean, it's totally possible. i think 2 requirements is to be 1) cute 2) talented. and since i've already got the first requirement down, i just have to work on my singing. LAWL. i'm kidding. sort of. anyways, that's another cover i did with the talented T-vo & N-pen.

sorry my blogs are so few and far between.

i just don't have much to blog about these days.

I love how the nights are getting colder. it's my favorite thing to really utilize my blanket at night and wear pajama pants. love it.

I watched tropic thunder last night with my bff. hilarious. it was quite good i might say. i love when movies have a lot of cameos. i think lance bass was my favorite. that guy is making a comeback! it's like my boyband days are alive within me, because everytime i watch dancing w/ the stars i'm always cheering him on! go lance! my brother proposed the idea for me, what if Lance Bass and Neil Patrick Harris were together? OMG. talk about my favorite gay couple ever. they could like sing together! haha. man.

thanks to California, they can't get married in our state. lame.

Hey! We have a new president. What up!

kthatsall.
bye!

and with every step together

we just keep on getting better.

finally covered this one! woohoooo!
hope you like it :D

k it's SAWturday, now we're gonna go watch SAW V. holllaaaa.

He knows my name

came across this song.
it's really beautiful.
i've been trying to learn it, too bad i'm not so great at the guitar.
just another beautiful reminder that He formed us and made us in His image, and regardless of who we are, mistakes we've made, we're forever in His hands.



I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Before even time began

My life was in his hands

I have a Father
He calls me His own
He'll never leave me
No matter where I go

He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
And He hears me when I call

---------------------------------

it's very fitting with Liwanag's Fall quarter theme. i love it.

God bless.

ps. TV was awesome today. i love thursdays.

it's like catching lightning

sorry my blogs are few and far between. you'd think i would blog more since i have so much time on my hands. lawl.

i've had a good past week. and weekend.
it's been a blur, obviously since i don't do much.

friday = good.
coffee :], irvine, HSM3, the guys dancing on the fountain at the district is always a good time.
i must admit, High School Musical 3 was quite entertaining. I love laughing at the times where you're not supposed to laugh. Like Zac Efron's ridiculous arm gestures. The music was good. I've been listening the soundtrack a lot. Thanks melissa!

saturday = great. i got to catch up with some of my favorite ladies. it was nice to fill in each other about our lives and all our happenings. but it was even better catching up with everyone else's lives.

here are a few random pictures:

kathee & i in front of the NBC Store in New York emulating our heroes.

St. Patrick's Cathedral by Rockerfeller Center. B-E-A-utiful.

jill willy & i at a bar in fullerton. i forgot the name already.

meechy & kathee, my former roommates. marites, where are you?!

round 1: 2 bluemoons, 1 magner's cider, and a stella

round 2: 1 bluemoon, pear cider, & rasberry cider

a very odd looking music min.
i spy: Doc Brown, a Peacock, Darrell, Patti Mayonnaise, a Shawshank inmate, and a chola.

A Chola sandwich, with Darrell bread. ahem.
anyways.

Thanks for the last 2 pics Chris.

Hope you enjoyed that mini update.

Life is ridiculous right now. Sure, i'm still doing nothing, but it doesn't mean that it's not interesting.

I don't want things to go back to the way they were, but it seems that's where it's heading. I don't know if i'm game.

OH! my room is 100% done now. i finally put up my bed. yeah, i still have a loft. yes, i know, it's quite adult of me. but i sleep better now.

guitar hero 4 is awesome.

i think this weekend is gonna be a good one: horror movies on halloween, torrance/carson adventure, SAWturday, and mass.

goodnight.

ps. HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY, DIANNE!!! sorry i didn't message you. BUT YOU DON'T HAVE A BLACKBERRY ANYMORE =[

a week without internet

can make me want to punch myself in the face, repeatedly, for entertainment purposes. because it was just that boring. luckily, my dad has about 300+ dvds in his collection. and i watched at least half a dozen movies. all of which were romantic comedies. i'm such a sucker for those rom-coms.

ANYWAYS, the week without internet has been interesting:
- movies galore
- trying to use aim on my blackberry
- sleeping on a bench in the park like a bum
- making a cheer to Rihanna's Disturbia
- the americana is alright
- quarantine is the worst movie ever
- talking on the phone is my only form of communication
- i miss my grandma
- the american apparel store at citadel!
- guppy's with angie
- Good Good by Ashanti
- sushi with the La Mirada folks

i don't know what else.
it was a good week.
boring at times.

ok. bye.

life has to begin sometime.

son of a bitch.

I DROPPED MY FUCKING PHONE IN THE TOILET.
other than that, NEW YORK IS AWESOME!!!!

i'm using the wifi in the lobby downstairs on martyMACfly.
besides the unfortunate happenstance that is dropping my phone in the toilet, i <333 ny. i don't know if i could ever live here though. it's crazy here. i'm an OC girl.

so, if you need to call/text me. you can't.
i'm going to at&t today anyway. thank God for insurance.

PEACE.
i miss ya'll.

ps. this picture is for all you HSMfans! let's go on opening night!

this time tomorrow...

I'LL BE IN NEW YORK!!!!!!!!
WHAT UP 2-1-2!

i'll miss you guys!
wish us a safe trip!

MAGANDANG UMAGA!

i've been sitting here for like 10 minutes trying to figure out a blog title and i had nothing. then erwin signed on, than i heard "MAGANDANG UMAGA!" in my head. so there you go.

anyways, it was a gooood weekend.

friday i got to spend w/ my two best friends:
















had dinner w/ jenny at olive garden.
















and matthew joined us at The Crosby























we enjoyed delicious sweet potato fries, some soju mixed drinks, and sangria. yum.

The Crosby is an interesting place. They have hip hop memorabilia & boom boxes around the place. The kitchen is open relatively late. They bump awesome music (of the 90s rap/hiphop). And it's filled with cool kids. Like Kathy Bernabe dressing kids. Cardigans and V-Necks galore, so at least Matthew and I fit in. haha. I recommend it! If i was a yelper, i'd probably write a review and give it 4 stars.

Saturday, I went down to San Diego with the 714 peeps (Kathee & Gerard) for the Ao1 gig. They did an awesome job!



there are more vids if you go to the actual video.
people came from all over california: san diego, irvine, camarillo, oxnard, palmdale, norcal, lakewood, and wherever else.















the band!
















the ladies!

more from the Ao1 gig on the flickr & i uploaded a bunch more on facebook. for some reason facebook wouldn't let me upload the Audience pictures.

anyways. 2 MORE DAYS TIL NEW YORK!!!!!!1
I CAN'T WAIT! Our flight is at 10:45 on Wednesday morning! WHAT UP 2-1-2! Julian agreed to let me borrow his DS for the flight! yay! I need to pack before Tuesday's meeting.

That's all. Purely an informative update on the ups in my life. 'Til next time my friends!

<333

no day but today

another day at home.
bo-ring.
did some more chores.
hung out with the parents.
i watched Rent today, it made my cry like 5 times.

my lola lives in a home now. i was supposed to visit her today, but my parents are gonna go this weekend instead.

anyways, new show: Bones.
it is awesome.
thank you, bellamay & abby!

this is a boring post. sorry.
i'm watching Bones.

we must let go to know what's right
no other course, no other way
no day but today

brand new day

today was quite the productive:

i cleaned my room for like, 3 hours. i finally made progress. as you can see in the first picture, i finally got most of my clothes in the closet. there are a few bags full of stuff i'm gonna try and sell to buffalo exchange. i'm moved the wood for my bedframe against the wall so i can actually walk in front of my closet now. there's still some stuff in there that's not mine, so i can't really do more until it's out. i actually have like 6 small unpacked boxes in the closet. haha. in the second picture i finally uprighted my bookcase, but i still have clothes on the ground. along with my mattress. oh well. soon and very soon. slowly but surely. only time will tell. the grass is greener on the other side. what other cliches are there? are those even cliches?

anyways! i also did laundry. my parents got a new washing machine a while back, but i haven't used it yet. since i did all my laundry for the past 2 years at pbay (sad face). it's so freaking technical. there's like an option FOR EVERYTHING. AND... yeah. i can't think of anything else. it took me forever to get my load started. that sounds weird. moving on...

i love tv. goes without saying. well apparently not, since i just said it. heroes was bomb. better than last week. i'm gonna watch himym after this blog.

went to irvine for the 8th time since i've moved home. that's a lot, considering i've been home for like.. 10 days. grrreat. i feel the fight with my parents coming soon. there was already a preview on sunday morning right before i left for motp. i'm gonna try to not upset her in the next few days, so i can still go out and play.

my lola isn't here. her room is empty & it looks like her stuff is gone. she was here when i left, i dno where she is now. i'm thinking she's either at my aunties house or at a home? but i hope she's okay.

tomorrow? i have a dentist appt in the morning, i should be sleeping right now. my appt is at 9. gonna see if i can clean more, do some more laundry, pick up my contacts in irvine. then LIWANAG FIRST MEETING!!! WHAT UP!!!!!!

i'm excited. but nervous. apparently i'm old now too. weeeird.

goodnight!

at first i was afraid, i was petrified.

from the bottom of my heart

THANK YOU SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH.
There are not enough so's in the world to thank you guys for all that you have done for the past month and a half. Thank you so much for your sacrifice, not just for me & mel or for UCC, but for Him. From the bottom of my heart I appreciate it, but I know that last night He was up there smiling. And I'm sure He was dancing along too.

DUDE, YOU GUYS SOUNDED SO FREAKIN' GOOD!!!!! NO JOKE! I can't tell you how many people came up to me and told me how amazingly beautiful you guys sounded. AND I'm not a great conversationalist, so many of those conversations were awkward. haha. BUT IT'S ALL GOOD!
Sorry if i made awkward huge smiling faces during mass, it's only because hearing you guys makes me smile awkwardly big!

Erwin asked me yesterday "So what are you going to do with your life?" and I DON'T KNOW! What am I going to do without you guys?! Thanks for making this whole process stress free AND FUN! Practices rarely stressed me out, because you guys made it fun and awesome! You guys really made this easier for me! I'm going to miss you guys!

To Choir:
Thank you for being patient with me when I didn't know what I was doing, musically or in general! Thank you for making this a prayer & really taking it seriously. I could see it in all of your faces, how much you loved praising Him and giving your all. It truly inspires me. You guys sounded like angels, no joke.

To the VERY VERY VERY talened musicians:
zOMG. You guys are SERIOUSLY rockstars. Freakin' MOTP ALL STAR BAND. Thank you so much for bringing your own style & talent into this family. IT WAS AWESOME. You guys made the music FUN and DIFFERENT, but still so prayerful. CAN WE START A BAND?!?!?!

To MEL:
THANK YOU SO MUCH MEL. For everything! All the hard work, THE COPIES, organizing! Being patient with me. I seriously could not have done this without you. You are seriously so awesome. Not just as a musician but as a leader AND an awesome friend. Thank you for listening to me rant. And making sure that I'm okay when I'm emo. I can't thank you enough! Not just for motp, but for EVERYTHING MEL. I LOVE YOU! (now, you better not use that against me.)

Finally, this has been one of the hardest weeks I've had in a long time, outside of motp, and you guys seriously made all the troubles disappear. Thank you for making me smile.

I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!!

<333, Kirsten

YOU GUYS ARE HOTTTT!

ps. YOU GUYS ARE BEAUTIFUL!
pps. MOTP CHOIR HANGOUT! THIS SUNDAY!!!! more info to follow!

before i leave

this has been one of the hardest weeks i've had in a long time
but, it was worth it for You

MASS ON THE PLAZA 2008!!!!!
TODAY, Sunday, September 28!
@the Engineering Plaza!

ps. despite the struggles, there were still a lot of times to smile. thank you :D

reunited and it feels so good

i'm at shawshank now, staying in bellamay, abby, & anna's room. thanks anna for letting me stay on your bed! kathee! if you were here, it would old roommates reunited. anyways, i just like being on my laptop, and listening to friends having conversations as i blog. i can hear abby showering and krystle diane calling bellamay on her cell, even if she's upstairs.

i love being in irvine.

i know i've only been gone for a week & i've been here almost every day. but just being here feels awesome.

motp is tomorrow. what. the. eff. it came up so fast. we're ready. i mean, sure things won't sound perfect or go over just as we rehearse, but hey as long as we're doing it for Him than it's gonna be all g in the h. good in the hood, my friend. good in the hood.

i'm still in "what the eff" mode right now.

i'm pretty sleepy right now. i've had a long day. even i don't have school or a job right now. ughh. damn.

ok. i'm gonna copy bellamay:
goodnight abby!
goodnight bellamay!
goodnight kim (even if you're sleeping already)!
goodnight krystle!
goodnight jamie!
goodnight anna, i wish you were here!

weeeee.

therapy

there are a lot of things that get me through the hard times. i got to use three of my favorites today: conversational therapy, retail therapy, & television therapy.

conversational
thanks for returning my call today :) it was really nice talking to you. thanks for listening to me vent, whine, complain, & cry. it hasn't been the first time. hopefully we can catch up more soon. thanks to all the people who i had good convos with today on aim, you know who you are. i also had awesome times at lunch with my brother, kathee, and her uncle (or my brother's cousin-in-law, whichever you prefer). food & conversation = foosational therapy? nope.

retail
i hit up Manila Arts & Trade with my mom today. i was looking for filipino stuff to wear for motp this sunday. i found something! it's not super fancy, but it's better than the same thing i've worn for 3 years. anyways, it's cool. i also went to target, but didn't get anything :[ but i did get 2 pairs of shoes at payless. hollaaaaa. i need to buy a pencil skirt tomorrow. i'm going to go shopping before i head to campus to help with the boothing.

and lastly, a love of my life,
television
DAMN it was awesome today. i only caught 2 of my 3 shows: The Office & Grey's Anatomy. DUDE THE OFFICE. THE OFFICE was freaking awesome. i watched it twice already. there are so many good things that came out of that. changed my life a little bit. my face hurt from laughing. Grey's was good too. it was a little intense i think. tried to fit a lot in one episode (you were right, Fran). but yeah. it was good nonetheless. looks like the seasons are off to a good start. i didn't get to watch ugly betty yet. hopefully i'll catch it soon.

i know i'm obsessed with tv. but whatever, it helps me not think about my own problems and let's me focus on other people's drama.

i heard this song like 4 times today.

anyways, i've got a long day tomorrow.
i'll leave you with this

Fairytales don't come true.
Reality is much stormier,
much murkier,
much scarier.
Reality is much more interesting than living happily ever after.

goodnight.

ps. please keep praying for my grandma.

time

since i've been driving back and forth to irvine everyday since sunday, i've had a lot of time to think about things. i don't usually like to have this excess time to think, because there are a lot of things that i'd rather not think about.

timing is everything . i've experienced a lot of bad timing in my life, and now is no exception. i really wished i moved back home later. i wish i could be in irvine right now, surrounded by you guys, and not here. like, i love being home but things are really hard right now. but i know this is where i should be.

if i stayed in irvine longer, who knows what would have happened. lawl.

i think you're being selfish.

although the timing is terrible, i've realized that this is the best for things. it's now time for me to move on, forget about you, and really start living. being who i'm supposed to be. i can't let you hold me down and hold me back forever. i know i'm better than this.

i really thought, and i still do think so sometimes, that i needed you. but i know who my real friends are. and to anna, bellamay&abby (via anna. lol) erwin & kathee. thanks for helping me see what's up. i think if i didn't have liwanag & motp choir right now, i'd go crazy.

on to more shallow things, i got a terrible haircut yesterday. don't say i didn't warn you, next time you see me. my philippines fob-status haircut is back in effect from last summer. hopefully i can get it fixed soon. thinking about dyeing it to, something more "adult-like" and presentable for interviews and stuff. my mom says i look "too punky" haha.

motp is this sunday. i mean, of course i'm stressed, but i still feel good about it. i guess my life has to come to a halt until sunday.


well, sorry this was such a downer blog. hopefully i don't have a lot of those in the next few posts.

please pray for my grandma.
and throw a couple of those bad boys out there for me.

peace friends.
off to have lunch with some awesome people.

you and me

We used to be together
Everyday together always
I really feel
That I'm losing my best friend
I can't believe
This could be the end

i guess that's it.
don't ever tell me i didn't try.

goodbye.

my favorite time of the school year

WELCOME WEEEEEEK!!!!!!

even if i'm not a student, i still love the rush of it all. new faces and excitement of trying to get people to join liwanag. WOOOOOOOO. i mean, sure, there's the pitfall of being rejected by people who "pretend" to be on the phone, but it's all good.

we've got a prime time spot this year, right in front of Langson Library. last year, we had crappy spots all the way by Humanities. The drawback is that we're in Douchebag City by all the frats. haaaa. all goood.

I have a feeling the rest of the week is gonna be De-wait for it-lightful! Delightful! Speaking of delightful things, fall tv has started! WHAT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Last night i watch Heroes! AND IT WAS AWESOME! and when i got home, i watch How I Met Your Mother on cbs.com. whooooo. man, it was awesome. I didn't get to watch Gossip Girl yet. Does anyone know if that plays online anywhere?

Well, I think we're gonna pack up soon? Or now. I'm gonna run outta battery soon.

so PEACE.

i really want to kick it with you

you'll be my american boy.
that song is stuck in my head right now. i just fell asleep for like... 10 seconds. i'm so tired right now, but i wanted to blog.

funny thing is, i don't know what to say. but it's okay! today was a good day. had brunch and pho for dinner, hung out w/ some of my favorite people. had good times and had good laughs.

although at the end of the night, instead of driving home to pbay i drove to my house. and i was mad tired & almost falling asleep on the road. that is a big time no no.

this week is a big week. welcome week. holla. it's one of my favorite times of the school year. on the reals. i love it. it's going to be different this year, being not a student anymore. that's weird.

i wish i had more time. i mean that in so many ways. i wish i had more time in the summer. i wish i had more time now. if i had more time now, i could probably fit you in my schedule.

ok, i keep falling asleep.
goodnight, friends.

chapter 1: transitions

i doubt i'm going to keep this chapter thing up. but since this is the first post coming from my new home, which was my old home, i figure this is the first chapter. well, this whole "my life is a book" metaphor doesn't really pan out. does that mean the other parts of my life were in a different book, or different chapters? but then, does that mean this new chapter isn't chapter one, it's like... chapter 4? i have no idea. oh well.

the blog title should be NEW chapter: transitions. but that wouldn't be as cool

anyways... this is my first blog from home. my room is totally ridiculous right now. seriously. it's like... my mattress in the middle of the room surrounded by piles of pants on one side, with my desk in one corner, but the place where you sit is up against the wall. my "desk" right now is my bookcase turned on it's side, with the shelves piled up on top on the other side of my mattress. at the foot of my "bed" are stacks of wood for my loft, which are lying in front of my closet. that makes it quite difficult to put my clothes in. my tv is in one corner, with no cable. aaand i have my brother's childhood artwork/school projects strewn about the room. you can see most of this to your <<=== left. i have to bags full of stuff i'm gonna try to sell to buffalo, but i doubt they're gonna take it. those picky bastards. like, i don't even know what are in those boxes anymore. a lot of them say "kirsten's crap" on them. i cleaned a lot yesterday before erwin's dinner. i wasn't even able to fit my bed before that, but i knew i had to unless i wanted to sleep on the couch. i think my room is gonna look pretty much like this for the next 2 weeks. even though i'm moved home there's still so much i have to do in irvine. welcome week tabling, servant leader mass, motp choir practices, motp, first meeting. ay. hopefully i'll clean a little bit every day. you know what is really ridiculous though? my mom keeps telling me to put stuff away, BUT i don't have anywhere to put it. you know why? because my closet is full OF EVERYONE ELSE'S STUFF. gah. i went to a wedding today. one of my brother's best friends, brian, married my brother's wife's best friend, candice! crazy. they all went to UCI too. anyways, i finally got my camera back from my parents, so hopefully i'll post pictures soon. if i can ever find the cord to connect my camera to my laptop. my uncle, who i call my cousin because he's only 20 and it's easier to say than explain how my uncle is younger than me, from japan was in town today. he's half japanese half filipino. but like... he's hella japanese washed. it's awesome. he's in a band and he plays drums. i took a picture of him and my brother and he did the fob peace signs. it was great. hopefully i'll post pictures of that soon. SO, even though i'm home now, it really doesn't feel like it yet. because i'm still all up ins the irvine mix. it hasn't hit me that I'M HOME. like, i'm sad. but i haven't realized it yet. i'm still in this "oh yeah this is awesome i get to fix up my room" phase. i do miss my apartment, especially my roommates (kathee, bellamay, abby, and you too, dean). i'm still in this weird transition phase, where nothing is settled yet. i mean, i'm sad. but i don't think i've really been SAD SAD yet.

well, i think i've blabbered on for too long.
goodnight.

<<---- this is me, being "sad" in my ridiculously messy room. oh yeah, before i leave i've got a lot of shout outs: HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERWIN, ANGIE, FRANNY, KATHEE, & KAYLENE!
CONGRATULATIONS MR.&MRS. HANSEN!

this is oddly accurate.

saw this on Franny's blog, decided to give it a go.

You entered: Kirsten B-------z A----o

There are 21 letters in your name.
Those 21 letters total to 101
There are 8 vowels and 13 consonants in your name.

What your first name means:

Scottish	Female	Variant of Kirsty: Christian. A Scottish variant of Christina.
Scandinavian	Female	Christian. Scandinavian form of Christine.
Norse	Female	Christian.
Latin	Female	Variant of Christiana. Follower of Christ.
Greek	Female	Christian.
English	Female	Variant of Christine, Christina, and Christiana. Follower of Christ.
Danish	Female	Christian.

Your number is: 2

The characteristics of #2 are: Cooperation, adaptability, consideration of others, partnering, mediating.

The expression or destiny for #2:
A number 2 Expression gives you the tools to work very well with other people. Your destiny is in the role of the mediator and the peacemaker. In many ways you are dependent on others and seem to function best in a partnership or in some form of group activity. Modesty runs deep in your nature, and you can work comfortably without recognition of your accomplishments. Often, others get credit for your ideas, and this is of little real concern to your since you are such a willing team player. As you grow in this direction, you become sensitive to the feelings of others, you are ever diplomatic in handling complicated situations. Cooperative, courteous, and considerate, you have the capacity to become an outstanding facilitator. You know how to organize and handle people. You are a good detail person because you rarely overlook anything. Tactful and friendly, nearly everyone likes you.

The negative 2 personality can be over-sensitive and easily hurt. Too much of this number in your makeup can make you very shy and uncertain. Sometimes the excessive 2 energies makes one apathetic and somewhat indifferent to the job at hand; the ability to handle details is hampered in these cases.

Your Soul Urge number is: 5

A Soul Urge number of 5 means:
The 5 soul urge or motivation would like to follow a life of freedom, excitement, adventure and unexpected happening. The idea of travel and freedom to roam intrigues you. You are very much the adventurer at heart. Not particularly concerned about your future or about getting ahead, you can seem superficial and unmotivated.

In a positive sense, the energies of the number 5 make you very adaptable and versatile. You have a natural resourcefulness and enthusiasm that may mark you as a progressive with a good mind and active imagination. You seem to have a natural inclination to be a pace-setter. You are attracted to the unusual and the fast paced.

You may be overly restless and impatient at times. You may dislike the routine work that you are engaged in, and tend to jump from activity to activity, without ever finishing anything. You may have difficulty with responsibility. You don't want to be tied down to a relationship, and it may be hard to commit to one person.

Your Inner Dream number is: 6

An Inner Dream number of 6 means:
You dream of guiding and fostering the perfect family in the perfect home. You crave the devotion from offspring and a loving spouse. You picture yourself in the center of a successful domestic unit

-------------------------------------------------------------------

so much of this is true, especially right now.

another early morning

this has been my 6th consecutive early morning. my reason for being awake early today is because i'm getting my wisdom teeth out. i haven't been making a big deal out of it, but i'm actually pretty scared. not a fan of the pain.

this whole wisdom teeth thing is a part of my "insurance ends in october, so i need to take care of everything" phase. hence, new contacts and my desire to go to the doctor for my ankle & eye twitch.

i'm scheduled for 8:30, so i should really go.

peace.

this is new

since i know i won't be posting on here just yet, i'm not going to publicize this one.
see ya.